(Reprinted with permission from Black Pearls Magazine)
The Key To My Pain takes place in Baltimore City in the early to mid-seventies, when racial tension is still high from the late nineteen sixty’s riots.The family of five are living just enough with Mr. Batchler being a police officer after leaving Vietnam and Mrs. Carolyn Batchler is a loving mother and wife to three aspiring sons.
Mrs. Carolyn Batchler is in love with her husband Rodney Batchler Sr. He promised to give her the family she never had but always wanted but she didn’t know her dreams of a happy ever after would unlock doors she never dreamed of.
Rodney Batchler Jr. the eldest of the three sons, he wants to be a basketball superstar, Edwin Batchler wants to be an artist and the youngest of the three Corey is just trying to find himself.
Rodney Sr. runs his house like a jail and his family like a warden. Carolyn is forbidden to work because Rodney Sr. wants to keep her subservient and he controls his sons with pure fear.
Verbal, mental and physical abuse happens every single day in the Batchler home. There is not day Carolyn can open her eyes and enjoy the beauty of the sun nor the sound of the rain. Rodney Sr. has single handedly put her internal light out with abuse and now her sons are starting to look at their mother as weak, helpless and a fool. The abuse is not limited to Carolyn, oh no. Rodney Sr. keeps his sons in line with the same mental, physical and emotional abuse he uses for his wife.
Experiencing abuse will and can lead you to the arms of people you think you can trust until the day that person unlocks the pain you gave them the key to. Love, Pain, Forgiveness and Hurt is all wrapped up in this 230 page novel. Follow the journey of the Batchler family as they discover life through tainted vision.
Message from the Author
I dedicate this novel, The Key To My Pain, to every person who has ever witnessed domestic violence and to everyone who has shared their pain with a person they trusted and loved only to have them use your deepest darkest pain to hurt you. You can’t trust everyone with the key because they will unlock doors you have closed.
Chapter Excerpt: The Key to My Pain
The long awaited visit.
Will somebody get the front door,” yells Chetta. The housekeeper is making up the beds and doesn’t hear the door so Chetta walks out of the kitchen to get the front door.
Chetta opens the door, “Hello.”
“Hello my name is Carolyn Batchler and I am…” Before Carolyn can finish introducing herself Chetta cuts her off.
“I know exactly who you are; please come in.” Carolyn walks in and looks around.
“Let me take your coat and have a seat.” Before Carolyn can take her coat off and have a seat Rodney Jr. walks down the staircase and looks right in his mother’s face.
Carolyn remains standing, “Hello son.” Rodney stands at the bottom of the staircase in a stare.
Chetta looks at her husband, “Rodney say something you’re being rude.” Chetta whispers. It’s been twenty three years since they both laid eyes on each other and Carolyn has dreamed of this day.
Carolyn walks over to Rodney, “Hello son.” A cold chill goes up Rodney’s spine and it causes him to shake. Chetta stands next to her husband looking on at the two of them and waiting for Rodney’s response.
“It’s been twenty three years since you walked away from me and I‘ve never stop thinking about you,” tears roll down Carolyn’s cheeks as she breathes easy. “I’ve watched you play basketball all through college and the NBA; I even watched when you went to the Olympics and won a gold medal. I have a photo album full of pictures when you were featured in the newspaper.”
Carolyn looks at Chetta, “You two had a beautiful wedding.”
“Thank you Mrs. Batchler,” says Chetta. Rodney turns to walk away from his mother.
“Do not walk away from me Rodney Jr.”
“Why should I stand here and talk to you?”
“Because like it or not I am your mother. I am the women who gave life to you,”
“That didn’t seem to matter when you were letting your husband take life from me.”
Chetta steps in, “Excuse me Mrs. Batchler.” Chetta pulls Rodney to the side. “This is your mother and she has come to talk to you at least hear her out. Honey this is what you need to get your head in a better space. You have spent years not living up to your full potential as a father and a husband; now is the time to get your questions answered,” Chetta whispers to him
“Rodney please talk to me,” asks Carolyn.
Rodney raises his voice,“Talk about what, why you let that man beat me, why you stayed married to a psychopath who abused you and mistreated your children while you watched and telling us it will get better and it never did! You didn’t even come to my high school graduation,” Rodney breaks down in tears. Carolyn walks closer to him and puts her arms around him.
“Get off of me,” Rodney backs away from Carolyn and leans up against the hallway wall.
Rodney’s oldest daughter walks in the house, “Mama whose car is that out front,” asked Carolyn (Rodney’s daughter)
“Carolyn come over here and meet your grandmother; your father’s mother and your name sake,” says Chetta trying to take away the awkwardness in the room.
Rodney’s daughter walks over to her grandmother wearing a big smile, “Hello grandma; I’ve always wanted to meet you.” The two of them hug.
Carolyn hugs her granddaughter tight and closes her eyes, “I can’t believe this.”
“My name is Carolyn just like yours. My father named me after you.”
Carolyn looks over at her son. Chetta rushes over to her daughter, “Come on with me let’s go upstairs and let your grandmother and your father talk.”
Carolyn (Rodney’s daughter) looks over at her father, “Dad what’s wrong?”
“Come on I’ll explain to you later,” says Chetta as she ushers her daughter upstairs.
Carolyn walks over to her son, “You named your oldest daughter after me; that must mean you don’t hate me.”
“I don’t hate you, I just don’t understand you and all that you put up with from that man. How could love him more than you love your own flesh and blood?”
“Rodney look at me, it’s time I explained my actions to you. I was in foster care from the time I was three years old. I didn’t have a family my parents died in a car crash and no one wanted me. I grew up lonely and when I met your father he gave me love and he promised me a good life and a big family. I didn’t know he had issues at the time and I didn’t have a place to run to son and I was afraid to live outside of the life he provided. I’m sorry for not standing up for myself and for my children. I realize that staying with him and tolerating his abuse damaged my children and me. I know the things that run through your mind because they run through mine too. Some days it’s all I can think about but I can’t get the years I suffered back. I press my way through and it’s been rough without you and your brothers.” Carolyn starts to cry again.
Rodney finally feels for his mother, he walks over to her and places his arms around her shoulders and they share a moment they both have been dreaming about.
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The Key to My Pain is available as a paperback novel, on audiobook and Kindle Unlimited ebook.
